I am pondering a couple of thoughts from the prayer.
Dave prayed that I would only be satisfied fully by God. Over our married years we've become increasingly more open and vulnerable with our struggles and we are learning that as much as we love each other God is the only true answer! He prayed that when other things threaten to take up residence that I would know the Truth. That I would know the lie.
He also prayed that I would be able to see the gifts of the day. He knew I was going in to work on my birthday and how low in energy I was going into it.
I went to bed full of hope and woke up full of hope.
I have a very clear memory of a birthday gone very wrong as a young child. I don't know about you but but my expectations for birthdays were very high. I believed, even as an early elementary child, that I deserved to be spoiled on my birthday. That everything should go just how I wanted - nothing amiss! I remember this particular birthday that the day was going all wrong. Mom said no to something that I wanted. I had to wait for everyone to be ready before we could get on with any sort of festivities. No one seemed to want to entertain my every desire! It was just like any other ordinary day! There was still work to be done. Imagine that!
Only one birthday a year to practise grateful celebration over expectant celebration isn't a lot of time in the grand scheme of things. My love of celebrations and of gifts can sometimes make this shift of focus hard. I believe the promise is in the prayer. The prayer to open my eyes to see what I normally wouldn't think worthy of seeing and receiving. Receiving is also key. I haven't always been great at seeing the small "free" gifts that pop into my days. Nor have I always been in the right frame of reference to receive and celebrate them. I don't think this practise should be reserved for birthdays, I believe it should be a daily discipline. It can just be harder for me to give up my expectations and allow God to have permanent residence on a day that is culturally bombarded with variations of "spoil me!"
I did get spoiled this year but it wasn't in the measurable or monetary way that I might have defined it a decade (!!!) ago.
*woke up early and was greeted and serenaded to by my wonderful, not-morning-person, husband!
*my kids woke up (also not usual) to send me off to work with a b-day greetings and hugs and kisses
*stepped out to a beautiful frost - took my breath away! I feel like God created an extraordinary work of living art to greet my day.
*was greeted in staff room at lunch with happy b-day Nicole! I looked up in surprise to see a friend working there. How did she know? Facebook!
*exchanged texts with my sister as she too celebrated her b-day. We're not twins but it is a neat story for another time. It was our first time texting each other!
*came home to my neighbour greeting me with happy b-day...good memory!
*fun with kids and Dave. I love playing games with them and got them into "Mad Gab" and "Boggle" They ought to be good at boggle as I played it during my labour. It's the only time Dave would ever play that game with me!
*AMAZING supper by Dave. We had raclette. FUN! FUN!! FUN!!!
*had cake with neighbours and family. This was impromptu and I am just so thrilled that it worked for them to come and that they wanted to come!
*was a relaxed evening with an early bedtime. I thought I would go to bed early but I LOVE reading in bed and was inspired.
I feel very celebratory as I recall receiving these beautiful gifts. Each item on the lists is kind of like a stone to put on my altar of thanksgiving to God for His grace in my journey. In Old Testament fashion, if I were to name the altar it would simply be, "Birthday Blessing."
"I bring an offering of worship to my King...Jesus may You receive the honour that Your due. Oh Lord, I bring an offering to You."
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