I Thirst

I recently finished reading "Mother Teresa: Come be My Light, the private writings of the saint of Calcutta," by Brian Kolodiejchuk. I was disturbed by the struggles that Mother Teresa faced. From this side of the world the torment was not observable. Even so, she bore much fruit and witnessed to the great love of God as she served the needy in Calcutta. Her desire to understand the suffering of Christ compelled her to love deeply. She lived Truth-based faith.

I recall a quote I read by Ann Voskamp that said "the opposite of faith is fear." I think about my own fears of following whole heartedly and see that my fear is that He won't know what is best for me.

The Cross shows me otherwise.

I am inspired by Mother Teresa's faith which was not guided by her emotions. She had a deep longing and thirst for God. She often wrote of her desire to "satiate thy thirst for souls." (p. 165) It was among her service to the poor that she knew God to be real to her. Her own deep longing for God and her desire to meet the call of God made her want to give her entire life to following Christ.

Last night we read the story of Jesus in the Garden of Gethsemane. We talked through our own "sleepwalking" and pondered what it would mean to watch and pray. How would that look in our lives today? How could we practise that?
Famous artwork accompanies the reflections on Lent. After reading and while reflecting one child leaned over to peak at the next days masterpiece, grimaced and turned away.
It was Jesus crucified on the cross.
"That's why I don't like Good Friday! Why is it good anyways? I don't even want to look at it!"

It is hard. Hard and beautiful all at the same time. Hard because it is at the Cross that we see and hear of the thirst of Christ. It is sobering and puzzling. He knows the weight of each sin. He knows deeply the oppression of each. He calls out "I thirst" on behalf of each. He is poured out, dried up Ps. 22:14.

It is beautiful for it is there we blind receive sight. Think of the perspective we would gain if we would take our moments of temptation and place it in front of the Cross. If we would believe that the power of God is our salvation for every temptation! If we would recognize our great thirst for Christ and His great thirst for souls.

While kneeling together in prayer last night there was an eyes-all-open feeling. A need for self-denial. The posture of adoration shows what my living reveals and creates desire to be filled with the everlasting water of life.

How do you approach the thirst of Jesus? Only one secret - the closer you come to Jesus, the better you will know His thirst. Jesus thirsts even now, in your heart and in the poor - He knows your weakness, He wants only your love, wants only the chance to love you. Mother Teresa